When my kids started asking my mom and sister for advice instead of me, I braced myself for jealousy. But you know what? It was one of the most freeing and eye-opening experiences of my parenting journey.

Recently, I read a fascinating article titled Moving in with my mom and older sister showed me it's OK if my kids go to someone else for advice. It struck a chord with me because it echoed something many parents secretly worry about: Am I enough? When kids seek guidance from grandparents, aunts, or others, does it mean we’re failing them?

Spoiler alert: No.

Here’s what I learned from living in a multigenerational household and embracing this new dynamic—and why it might just transform your parenting experience too.

The Unexpected Gift of Sharing Guidance

At first, I felt like my role was being usurped. My kids went to my mom for relationship advice, to my sister for school dilemmas, and sometimes they just wanted to vent to someone other than me. I admit, it stung. But then I realized this was a precious gift—not a loss.

Why? Because:

  • Different perspectives enrich your kids' understanding. Each person brings unique experiences and wisdom.
  • They get to choose who feels safest for specific topics. It’s empowering for kids to decide who to confide in.
  • It reduces pressure on you. Parenting is tough; sharing the load helps you stay sane and connected.

The Power of a Village: Why It Takes More Than a Parent

The idea of parenting as a solo endeavor is outdated. In fact, many cultures have long embraced the “it takes a village” philosophy. That village can be grandparents, siblings, friends, or community members.

Living with my mom and sister underscored this. Watching how they interacted with my kids, offering advice from a place of love and experience, I saw my kids flourishing emotionally. They felt supported by a web of care, not just one person.

How This Changed My Approach to Parenthood

With this shift, I stopped feeling threatened and started feeling grateful. Here’s what I did differently:

  • I welcomed their voices. Instead of competing, I invited my mom and sister to be part of decision-making and conversations.
  • I reflected on my own limits and strengths. I started focusing on what only I can provide—my unique connection with my kids.
  • I encouraged my kids to communicate openly with all of us. No secrets, just support from different angles.

What This Means for Alternative Paths to Parenthood

If you’re exploring non-traditional ways to build your family—whether through at-home insemination, adoption, or surrogacy—this lesson feels especially vital. Family and support networks don’t always look like the nuclear family from decades ago. And that’s OK!

Take MakeAMom, for example. Their at-home insemination kits empower people to create families on their own terms, often outside of traditional clinical settings. Just like welcoming varied advice sources, embracing alternative conception methods is about building your own village, your own way.

The Emotional Upside: Less Pressure, More Connection

When you stop feeling like you alone have to be the expert, the counselor, the rock, parenting becomes lighter. Emotional wellbeing improves—not just for you, but for your kids too.

It’s about creating a safe ecosystem where your children know they have multiple safe harbors. And the beautiful part? They grow up learning that seeking help is a strength, not a weakness.

So, What’s the Takeaway?

If your kids come to others sometimes—grandparents, aunts, friends—that’s a sign of a healthy, supportive environment. It means your child feels loved and heard from many angles. And that family is love, no matter the shape it takes.

Parenthood isn’t about being perfect or all-knowing. It’s about embracing the imperfections and opening your heart to those who can join you in raising your kiddos.

Have you ever felt threatened or relieved when your kids turned to someone else for advice? Share your story below—I’d love to hear how you navigated this beautiful, complex journey.

And if you’re curious about ways to create your own path to parenthood—whether with support from loved ones or tools like MakeAMom’s at-home insemination kits—there’s a whole world of resources waiting for you. Because every family, every journey, deserves to be celebrated.